I heard a funny story on the radio, listening to Les Grosses Têtes, a popular radio show in France.

Caution, please do not read if you are easily offended by off colour, dirty stories.

Translated from French into English.

So, a little background first: pilots can either talk to each other on their headsets in the cockpit (as there is too much noise to to talk without headsets), or they can address the passengers by clicking a button.

The head pilot doesn’t know he has accidentally touched the button to address the passengers, and he thinks he’s talking to his co-pilot.

Conversation

Pilot: Okay, so we’ve just served food. Maybe a little coffee now, and then afterwards, we’ll bring the hostess in for a little blowjob.

The hostess hears this over the speaker at the back of the plane, and starts running to warn them that the microphone is on the wrong switch.

A passenger stops her in mid-run and says: “No, no. Don’t run so fast, they said AFTER their coffee!!”

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Okay. So, you asked and I listened!

I find it kind of fun to dress up in these outfits and take pictures.

Don’t know if I could do it everyday like some really amazing bloggers out there (t h e (c h l o e) c o n s p i r a c y for one, academic chic, Kelina KELINDA, or Allie from My Wardrobe Today)

Click on any of the images to make them larger

(And please excuse the lack of ironing.)

I am on the Ruffle Train…

Bought the ruffly blue top at Bluberry on Ste-Catherine.

It’s a bit too arm fatty for my liking around the boob/armpit area, but it’s nothing a little jacket can’t fix

Now I can wear it to work!

I only own 2 ruffle tops in my ENTIRE wardrobe.

This is the second one.

Bought from Ricki’s for $25!

(Discounted, as one of the pearl-like buttons fell off, but she gave me a spare one, and I spent 45 minutes sewing EVERY pearly button on super tight)

Total departure from what I normally wear, but I like it anyway.

(I tend to gravitate towards very simple, plain pieces without any frills or ruffles)

Plus, it’s loose. Great for eating.

Etsy is the Dress Devil!

These were my two purchases from BlackRabbitNYC on Etsy.

They are faux obi wraps, so I just pull them on over my head, do a quick tie and go.

(Why does my hip look weird on the purple dress where my hand is? Odd.)

And on the 50% rack you can find…

Stuff Urban Outfitters for $22 (and actually worth $22 in my opinion)

I am starting to really get into the dress.

The macrame-braided top half has a lot of colours, so it can match with almost anything as shown below:

NOW I NEED YOUR HELP!

WHICH DRESS SHOULD I WEAR FOR WHAT WEDDING?

As you may know, I am going to 2 weddings next year in Europe.

One is in France, one is in England.

For England, I hear you can dress up like the Queen and still be under dressed. (Just kidding.)

Which is the opposite in France, apparently.

A reader kindly sent me pictures of his wedding in France so I could see what the other guests wore.

And I’ve read that if you dress up for a wedding, they pretty much know you’re an American

Still, I don’t want to show up in something plain!

They’re WEDDINGS!

So, help me choose. Which one?

Dress Choice #1

Blue Drop-Waist Comfy Dress with or without magenta sash & Miss Sixty Yellow Flowered Heels

Surprisingly, those Miss Sixty Heels are TIGHT on my feet. NO chance of them falling off or going weird.

Dress Choice #2:

Dress Barn Black Flower Print

I wore this to a wedding already, so it’s an oldie, but a goodie.

Dress Choice #3:

Ann Taylor Loose, Flowing Sheath, with or without sash and Bronze Steve Madden Kitten Heels

Dress Choice #4:

Any of the above casual dresses I modeled at the top of this post.

So, what do you think?

(Yes, I really do like to plan my outfits months in advance.

I don’t like showing up unprepared, and I like having choices and backups)

It is exactly what you think it is.

A vagina necklace, modeled after your own vagina specifications.

Read all about it here on Oh Hell Nawl!

The day started out great.

I wore the same blue sweater from yesterday because it did such a great job keeping me warm without adding bulk.

And I woke up with model hair!

And I wore the awesome ring I won from Ginger @ Ginger Won’t Snap.

Then I went shopping and ended up with NADA.

Winter Coat Verdict: I am all shopped out

I normally don’t like to admit defeat, but it’s been 3 days of pounding the pavement for 8 hours a day, scouring all the high, mid and low end shops for something reasonable.

And that is:

• Not Black, Grey, White or Red
• Simple, classic design
• No extra fiddly belts and closures
• Made out of good quality fabric (a lot of the coats felt AWFUL)
• Doesn’t cost my arm & leg (around $200 – $300 was my price range)
• With pockets

….I’m exhausted.

I’m sick of shopping! (*gasps heard all around the internet*)

So what are you going to do, without a winter coat?

I have a winter coat.

I have 2. They just aren’t really ideal.

One is too short (just barely covers my bum), and the other is ivory (not the best colour to keep clean in winter).

I’ll just wear them and become best friends with my local dry cleaner.

I survived a winter here without an ideal winter coat, and I can sure as hell do it again.

Especially if the price is …FREE….

To cope, I had some Pho at Pho Lien (review coming up tomorrow)

…. & bought some designer chocolates from a chocolatier on Sherbrooke Ouest.

My verdict?

Meh. They’re awesome chocolates, but for the price ($2.25 each), I’d rather eat the cheap stuff.

Still, they were good

La couleur est magnifique!!!!!

Exact words coming out of the Musée-des-Beaux-Arts Shop employee. A guy about mid-40s.

Pardon my bad French in advance. I am trying to re-create a conversation from 7 hours ago, in my new language!

Curator: Bonjour! (Hello)

FB: Bonjour…(Hello)

Curator: *stops and stares* La couleur est MAGNIFIQUE!!! Le bleu.. oh, c’est vraiment.. (The colour is magnificent. The blue.. oh it’s truly..)

*starts coming over to me*

FB: Oh! … *heavy red flush*.. Merci beaucoup. J’aime la couleur aussi. (Thanks a lot, I like the colour too)

Curator: Sous un projecteur, c’est vraiment MAGNIFIQUE! Je vois pas une couleur comme ça… (Under these lights, it’s truly magnificent. I have never seen a colour like that)

*reaches over and feels my sweater arm*

FB: Er… Merci!!! (Thanks!)

*starts petting her own arm too*

Curator: C’est belle. Vraiment. (It’s beautiful. Truly…)

The guy was so enthusiastic.. he was having a seizure just looking at my sweater under the lights.

He couldn’t stop gushing.

I almost wanted to let him try it on for himself.

Smashbox Primer: Returned (*cha ching!*)

I tried the original Smashbox Primer in a sample version and I l-o-v-e it.

It really does make makeup last on your face for the whole day (I wear it for big events and weddings).

I bought the oil-control one without silicones or any SPF, but I couldn’t justify keeping it.

Where the heck would I wear it?

To control oiliness inside my apartment while I schlep around in MUGG boots and a slip? (No, really!)

Right now, a waste of money.

But maybe if I start working again, I might pick up a sample instead of the whole bottle.

You’ve mentioned that you like my outfit posts

Really?

Well I’ll get around to posting a couple more things from my wardrobe.

Like my options for wedding attendee wear next year… and experiments.

I’ll also post all my purses and shoes. I took snapshots of them, and thought it’d be nice to have them here on the blog for posterity.

Well-Heeled
www.wellheeledblog.com

She has been one of the first blogs I ever started reading, period.

I love her short, simple posts that range from foodie blogging (check out her poached egg in pictures awesomeness!) to talking about personal things in her life with a moneyed angle.

It isn’t a blog on how to get out of debt or save (although she does have some posts from time to time), but a real personal finance blog.

…love, Maegan
www.lovemaegan.com

She has some pretty amazing style, and looks like a blonde superstar.. but other than having a girl crush on her, the girl is creative!!!!

She is awesome at pairing outfits together, and even better at thinking up of cheap and chic ways to create her own high-end fashion.

Check out this post on how she created her own YSL Silver Cage Shoes on the cheap.

Dilbert Daily Strip

dilbert.com

An oldie but a goodie. Scott Adams never fails to make me laugh.

Omiru: Style for All

omiru.com

An excellent site that features cheap & chic options for men and women. It doesn’t just focus on women’s wear.

What I like, is that guys can submit questions like “What is and how do I get my hands on a bespoke suit?” and get an excellent answer.

Random Anny

RandomAnny.com

I just LIKE her. I like her personal posts, and she posts some pretty great inspirations for the home.