I don’t think you should have to qualify why you have debt, how you accumulated it or why it is good debt or bad debt. You shared this info because you were proud of what you have done for your financial situation. Readers shouldn’t try to diminish that because they may disagree. Just keep those things to yourself, nosy reader!

Anonymous raises some good points, but to claim that FB needs a reality check when she cannot be fully aware of FB’s situation is inserting a personal judgement when none was called for.

How you choose to handle money is a deeply personal matter. What’s right for FB clearly seems extravagent to Anonymous, but chances are FB would be miserable & gain little benefit from the more stringent practices of Anon. It might even undermine her ability to save enough to pay off her debt. No one likes to live in misery when there are other options.

This is also one of the downsides to posting about such a hair-trigger topic as publicly as bloggers do. You open yourself up to a whole spectrum of responses. (Like the 2nd anonymous rant, above. Wow.) I don’t know the best way to handle it; I don’t think I would enjoy the public scrutiny.

Keep your head up, FB. This is another person’s opinion. Just an opinion. If it doesn’t ring true for you, then try to let it go.

I respect you for sharing your learning process with those of us doing the same thing!

1. there is “good” debt and “bad” debt. education falls into the “good” debt category, as does equipment for work, to wit, your laptop (which, notice, i did *not* question), mortgage (sometimes), life insurance. not sexy, but necessary. there’s a reason there are tax write-offs for the investment in a home office. an expenditure that you yourself admit was more than you planned (even if you have the money) is not good debt.

2. proper attire for work is necessary, that’s why there are such things a initial signing bonuses and clothing allowances. fine. having your boots destroyed by the dog and having to replace them, necessary. $550 to do that at the end of the season, when you admit you spent more than you planned? when you’re in debt, you need to ask yourself if spending that amount is justifiable. buy 9-west not jimmy choo even if that’s a step down for you, when you don’t owe as much, replace them and go upscale. don’t deny yourself, but be able to justify it.

3. clothing is not an asset. jewelry is, assuming they are precious gems and precious metals. clothing will depreciate, go out of style, wear out — it’s a consumable. when in debt, buy only what you absolutely need, buy the best you can afford and take good care of it. do not give in to trends. if you have enough clothing and accessories that you can comfortably sell them and not suffer, then you have too much. that also says maybe you have an addiction or you have simply fallen prey to fashion marketing and advertising, which can be insidious.

3. you mused that perhaps you should pay back BF for the food he feeds you. that sounds like a twinge of guilt, even if said in jest. if you do feel guilty, pay him something, even if you take the emergency fund spent on boots and use it for that. it doesn’t sound to me based on what you wrote that you are %100 ok with taking his food for free — so, don’t overspend on wardrobe and pay him back.

4. you said that $72 is not an unreasonable amount to spend on groceries. but you also said that you spent only that amount because you forgot to eat. so the inverse would be that had you remembered to eat properly, or at all, you would have spent more. food is a priority.

5. the car analogy is not a good one. i don’t know anyone (with the exception of the extremely wealthy, and even then…) who would purchase a car without making sure it was something that was a necessity. yes, circumstances change — a job loss, a relocation, a new job with a closer commute — can necessitate selling it off, but when you owe, you do need to ask yourself every single time you buy something, “do i need this?

this is part of growing up. just because you don’t have a family yet, doesn’t mean that you should not be thinking this way. this thinking will not just come as soon as you start a family. it needs to be integrated now so that it becomes part of who you are, and so that your future family will not feel like a burden. it’s not about denying yourself, it’s about being smart and honest with yourself.

and i am anonymous for my own reasons… you don’t know anything about me, who i am and where i’m coming from and i wish it to remain so. there is no reason to have this information to learn sound financial thinking and techniques.

There are certainly more ways that my husband and I could save, but I don’t think we could do much more at this point without a good bit of backlash. After all, what’s the point of saving money if you can’t enjoy some of it before age 65?

Besides, and more importantly, we’re already cutting back in enough areas that I think we finally have a handle on things (we’ll know for sure in a few months once things have settled).

I really respect that you are managing your money and debt so well – I really am trying to do better financially in my life (at least have a clearer idea of financial goals, saving, etc) and I have to say a lot of the inspiration comes from you and your blog! So, thank you, and you are doing awesome.