FB: .. just an interesting contrast between what is being posted for “wives” (women) and for guys for ideas of what they’d like to change for the New Year..
The first one was what was given for wives as their possible New Year Resolutions..
I find it a bit condescending that they would put “Cook more often” as the wife’s responsibility (it’d make sense to have it as a family resolution)… but I digress.
Cook More Often
Cutting back on your take-out habit and actually firing up the stove on weeknights might seem like an unexciting resolution to commit to. But by resisting the lure of that stack of menus even just a few nights a week, you’ll be rewarded with way more than the satisfaction of eating off of plates instead of Styrofoam containers.
You’ll sneakily accomplish two loftier New Year’s goals: saving money and eating healthier. Even buying groceries at “Whole Paycheck” will be cheaper than thrice weekly orders of Pad Thai and spicy tuna rolls (especially when you add on the shrimp dumplings and tip the delivery guy). You don’t have to be vegan to chef up meals that are less fattening and more vitamin-rich than restaurant fare.
But it’s important (and more fun) to spend time together in the kitchen; it’s conducive to better conversations and husband-wife bonding, rather than what you’d get when plopped on the sofa eating from take-out containers in front of Top Chef.
FB: Oh at least they have the idea of you two being together in the kitchen…
Revamp Your Wardrobes
Read Meg @ the Bargain Queen’s post on revamping your wardrobe/having style resolutions for 2008!
And ChristianPF had a good article on simplifying your wardrobe as well.
If your closet is so crammed that things that go in freshly laundered come out wrinkled from the squeeze, it’s time to streamline. It’s professional organizer conventional wisdom that most people wear 20 percent of their clothes 80 percent of the time, and it won’t take you long to ID the 80 percent that you never wear.
Parting with it, however, can be a struggle (“but I used to live in miniskirts” or “what if I get rid of this flannel shirt, and then next month I need something to wear to a mid-’90s theme party?”). To get the perspective you need to shed the excess, take turns trying on your iffy old clothes in front of each other and doling out honest (but not brutal) feedback on which pieces deserve to be ditched.
FB: I agree with this one. I’m doing this one for sure…it applies to all women not just to wives
Book a Do-nothing Vacation
Even though you know that vacations are good for your body, spirit, and relationship, it’s hard to commit to shelling out for travel when you’ve just read an article informing you that your future kids’ college tuitions will top $500k. But you can sneak in a vacation without denying your progeny advanced education — do a little Internet research and stay flexible about where and when you’re up for going (deals can often be had in January, since it’s after the holiday rush but before Spring Break).
Go ahead and ignore the little voice that says you should travel to culturally rich foreign capitals. With the U.S. currency in the tank, those places are too expensive anyway, so stick to umbrella drink destinations close to home without feeling like a slacker. Right now you can score airfare to Bermuda plus a four-night hotel stay for less than $500 each through Jet Blue’s website.
FB: I like how they snuck that little advertisement for Jet Blue in there..
And the more economical option would be just to take some time for yourself and do a spa day… either at home, or paying someone for it. It’d be cheaper than $500, I’d imagine.
Stop Having Sex in Your Bed
And start doing it in every other corner of your house. Back in the day, smoking hot sex may have meant risque locations, naughty costumes, or props that could almost make Jenna Jameson blush, but now that you’ve settled into married life, steaming it up can be as simple as moving down the hall.
Even if you’ve already christened the living room, the bathroom, and the kitchen floor, revisiting those spots will still have a sizzle factor that more time under your duvet can’t equal. Getting it on up against the dining room table or on an area rug will always feel more sexily spontaneous than coupling up in bed; plus, it forces you to twist into inventive positions that might become new favorites.
FB: What if you have kids? Is that really feasible?
Support His Guys’ Nights Out
Sure, it’s hard not to resent the hours he spends away from you playing fantasy baseball or listening to Grateful Dead bootlegs with his buddies, not to mention the way he stumbles into bed afterward reeking. But if you consider that letting him have a guys’ night without grief may be the single biggest thing you can do to win “coolest wife on the planet” credentials, it’s really not such a big price to pay, is it?
Tell him he should spend even more time having fun with his friends because he works so hard and it’s so important for him to unwind. You’re showing him that you truly care about his happiness (and accept that browsing the drawer pulls aisle at The Home Depot doesn’t cut it). That’s the sort of sentiment that will make your marriage stronger and make him eager to end those guys’ nights at a sane hour to race home to your side.
FB: A guy clearly wrote this. Or had some influence. I think it could work the other way too with women having their Girls Night out.
And now aimed to guys in general…
With this one, I noticed a conspicuous LACK of mention about coooking at home, or asking your wife to try different sexual positions in different parts of the house…
1. Go see the musician you keep saying that you always wanted to see. That rolling stone won’t keep on rolling forever.
2. Congratulations on finally going hands-free while driving. Now try going phone-free when backing out of the parking space, and iPod-free while changing lanes, smart guy.
3. So you’re constantly sick of work. Know what cures that? Using your sick days. Just look at a calendar and decide. Four days equals one long weekend per season, and it’s easy to survive the cubicle knowing that an escape is just weeks away.
4. Every great thing has its Golden Age. Often that age is right now. Live there, not in some glorious past you’re probably misremembering.
5. Act like a grown-up when you’re writing an e-mail: No more emoticons and cut the LOLs, which now means “loser on line.”
6. Cut down by one beer each session. You’ll save 150 calories and up to $5 a pop. Ten fewer beers a month means a yearly 5 pounds off your gut and an extra $600 in your wallet, which equals concert tickets and a hotel room for your sick-day excursions.
7. It’s been too long. Enough with calling dudes “dude.”
8. Root out resentment. Rather than play trial court with your buddy, say, “You’re right. I screwed up. I’m sorry.” There’s plenty of blame to go around; accept your share. Move on.
9. Streamline your space. A big box of Hefty bags goes for $15. A shredder costs $50. And a year has 52 Saturdays, so on 12 of them, excise the unproductive memories, dated manuals, and worn-out clothes.
FB: I guess this is the guy’s version of the wardrobe resolution..
10. Drop three compliments a day. You’ll become known as the guy who doesn’t open his mouth just to complain. People will have your back when you need them most.
11. Take out the earbuds. Stifle the Bluetooth headset. Talk to people who are right there with you. You just might connect or learn something, like, say, that there’s a car heading toward you in the crosswalk.
12. Traffic exists. So leave the house 10 minutes earlier. You’ll do 10 percent less swearing, stressing, and apologizing.
13. Ask your dad questions he hasn’t heard for a while, like about his major, favorite movie, or best vacation. It won’t magically bridge the distance, but it’ll throw up a little iron you both can begin to build on.
14. Have you noticed? It’s a presidential election year, again. This time around, let’s all remember that there’s far more that unites us than divides us. So keep the conversation civil, your vote in perspective, and your humility in place.
15. There’s nothing that happens after 11:30 p.m. that can’t be replied to or TiVo’d the next day. Hit the pillow for some restorative sleep, then hit the ground running tomorrow, while others are still trying to find their legs (and their Starbucks gift cards).
FB: Why didn’t they a) have more resolutions for women.. and b) have more politically active and/or financially active resolutions for women AND men?
I find it a bit disheartening but I suppose it’s part of what society perceives (still) as being “men’s” and “women’s” work and/or thinking.
Regardless, I would’ve been MUCH happier had they posted about financial makeovers or goals as part of people’s New Year’s Resolutions. Something along the lines of:
1. Pay off ONE Credit Card debt or loan
2. Save at least 3% for retirement, if not more, if there’s a company match involved
3. Learn how to budget and/or create a budget that works for you/your family
4. Learn the difference between being cheap and being frugal
5. Save for a healthy emergency fund
6. Spend less and buy only what you need
7. Buy higher quality instead of quantity
8. Plan your meals in advance
9. If your spouse/significant other handles the cash, make an effort to learn about where it’s going, why, and educate yourself
10. Cover yourself by ensuring your legal affairs are up to date (a will, whatever)
Update: I just read Meg’s great post at the Bargain Queen about revamping your wardrobe and I’ve found it quite helpful. Read it here. 
- How much is enough?
- Canadian + Home Decoration = Call for a volunteer
- Asians and their ‘mystique’..?
- The Wealth Gap in Relationships: Madame X
- No, seriously?
Life is Wonderful
on Dec 28th, 2007
@ 7:07 PM:
I think a guy wrote that article…for sure!
Meg from The Bargain Queen & All About Appearances
on Dec 29th, 2007
@ 1:42 AM:
Thanks for the link!
My New Year’s resolution: return the link love ; )
Fabulously Broke in the City
on Dec 29th, 2007
@ 9:05 AM:
Life: The sexual positions and cooking were what tipped me off LOL!!!!
Meg: aww.
no worries hon!