I really don’t believe it’s all biological or that men are pigs.

That’s a lot of hogwash! (Get it? Get it?… Never mind.)

It’s just a question of circumstance, opportunity and attitude.

Plenty of women cheat. Just as much as men, I’d wager.

So here are my three vague theories about why it seems like men cheat more than women.

1. Generally more men are successful than women.

Hang on.

Don’t get your panties in a twist just yet.

Read the whole paragraph before going straight to the comments and ranting.

We have the infamous glass ceiling.

Women typically make less money than men, and get passed over for more executive promotions than men because of the fact that they’re the ones who get pregnant and give birth to babies.

That’s it.

That’s the only major difference between men and women in the workplace — maternity leave.

As a side note, great solution would be to implement mandatory paternity leave so it evens out the playing field.

For that reason, it is why men are generally more successful than women.

Which means, they are also usually the gender that is under the most scrutiny from the media and it SEEMS as though more men cheat than women.

2. Women in the relationship seem to be mistresses most of the time.

It really seems as though in many of the cases of women coming forward and saying that she slept with so-and-so, she is a single woman (or escort) with no boyfriend or husband.

It never seems to be a married woman with kids who risked it all to be with a politician or famous celebrity.

Those famous men are generally always married with/without kids and just simply have more to lose.

3. Men seem to be intimidated by famous, successful women.

Which means, that average men don’t approach said women.

And the chances of a married woman celebrity cheating on her husband is quite low as a result.

If they see a sexy celebrity across the way, most Average Joes are not going to go up and start whispering sexy sweet nothings in her ear.

They’re thinking: What the heck do I have to offer to her? She’s rich, famous, beautiful AND smart. I have nothing she wants.

The opposite is true with women approaching men.

Those women know they have the beauty and body that those men are craving for, and perhaps a slight biological need to spread the seed around, kicks into place.

A man with lots of women throwing themselves at him, is a happy man. He’ll take any of them.

And a woman, with lots of men after her, is a happy woman… but seeing as she has the “power” in these relationships, will only pick the best of the lot, and secure her choice.

More strategic, I think.

So those are my three hare-brained theories about why it SEEMS as though men cheat on women more.

Care to share any of your own?

Very interesting, but definitely not surprising.

Note: This is U.S. data. Sorry for not clarifying sooner!

“Overall, federal workers earned an average salary of $67,691 in 2008 for occupations that exist both in government and the private sector, according to Bureau of Labor Statistics data. The average pay for the same mix of jobs in the private sector was $60,046 in 2008, the most recent data available.”

And let’s just add insult to injury:

“These salary figures do not include the value of health, pension and other benefits, which averaged $40,785 per federal employee in 2008 vs. $9,882 per private worker, according to the Bureau of Economic Analysis.”

Via Big Government

It’s amazing how some roles have such a big difference in pay, such as Clergy at $70,000 in the government, versus around $40,000 in private sector.

Or Graphic designer at $70,000 versus $46,000 in the private sector.

But maybe the work is different?

I can see that for IT because to me, they’re sort of ambiguous.

IT in general is fairly new as an industry, and we don’t have exact definitions as to what each role does.

A computer systems analyst to someone might be a computer support specialist to another.

But to me, they are two completely different job roles and tasks, which can be subdivided even further depending on what applications we’re talking about.

Then you factor in the actual tasks involved, and setting up a computer for an employee is a different job from doing IT help desk support to troubleshoot a system or any kind of specialized software.

People always ask:

“I’m starting to save, and it’s beginning to hurt. How do I save without feeling like I’m saving?”

At first glance, you might think: What kind of fool question is that?

But I am not guilty to admit that I thought the exact same thing when I first started!!!

When I first started budgeting and thinking about my money, I felt like saving was being in a horrible mental prison.

“I am making all of this money, 70% of it is going to debt each paycheque, WHY THE HECK DO I NEED TO SAVE THE REST? ARRRRRRRGH!”

It was torturous to see my money disappear so quickly towards debt, and then to know I had to spend another 30% of it in bills and a small, small bit of it on fun.

I didn’t see the point. I felt angry. I wanted to go on shopping binges.

I wanted to do MORE. Buy more. More of everything.

I felt like life was not fair, why didn’t I learn about money sooner, blabbedy bla bla….

*cue the waterworks and the pity-me princess routine*

After I got over myself, I realized that my focus on money, debt and saving was very negative.

So how do I do it now without throwing a mental temper tantrum at life?

My Secret: Change your focus

I needed to change what I was doing from being negative (crying about deprivation of money and stuff), to being positive.

I am doing what  I did before (actually, MUCH more), and I’m happy doing it…(which is something I never thought I’d say).

I can still buy anything I want

I tell myself all the time:

You COULD buy that if you wanted to.

But do you? Really?

Is it going to improve your life significantly?

Or do you just want it as an impulse purchase?

Think about the precious space it’ll take up in your suitcases when you move — is it worth the space & weight?

99% of the time, it’s just my inner repressed shopaholic lusting after something shiny and new, but then my saver personality takes over and is way more practical.

So yeah. I can truly buy anything I want if I set my mind to it.

I just CHOOSE not to, which is very different from not being able to.

…and saving money is the happy result!

My #1 priority is not to buy things to clutter up my life and physically tie me down anywhere (hence the aversion to home ownership), or otherwise known as “minimalism”.

I choose not to buy.

I don’t buy what I don’t need or really, really, really want.

Since I don’t buy anything I don’t want, I save the money.

And the more I save, and the more I realize how unnecessary STUFF is to make me truly happy, the happier I get thinking about and using what I already own.

It sounds so New Age-y and strange to get happier over time, but it’s true.

My top 3 happy (PG-13) buttons:

1. Great, stimulating & fun conversation (BF, Friends, Bloggers, Socializing in general)
2. Delicious food – it’s seriously orgasmic when it’s done right. Totally makes my day.
3. A really great night’s sleep

So, what are your triggers to save? Are you happy to be doing it?

From the wonderful discount gift card website Gift Card Granny who partners with eBay.com, Plastic Jungle and GiftCards.com, I am giving away:

TWO Best Buy Gift Cards for $25 each

and

TWO Kohl’s Gift Cards for $25 each

Rules

• You can only enter to win ONE of the gift cards (be fair and share!)
• It is only for U.S. residents (sorry, I got shafted too…)
• Contest ends April 16th 2010 at midnight EST.

How to win

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@brokeinthecity is giving away one of four $25 gift cards to either Best Buy or Kohls –> http://bit.ly/bH3H2A

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